So out of the blue I decided I want to start writing again. Because I’m bored but tired. Can you imagine?
Anyway, I quit my job last March after four years of slaving myself in the Emergency Room. I felt the time was right to move on and further my career elsewhere. But if anything, I will forever be indebted to the people who trained me to become the nurse that I am now.
RNH was my first overseas (and most serious) nursing job. Back home, we don’t give as much fuck about chest pain like how we do it there. We don’t have electronic version of everything, we do old school style where Mercury is still a fad. And documentation is not a biggie. Life was easy. Then I went abroad. To say that I made major, major adjustment is the understatement of the century. I felt like I had to relearn everything from scratch, and I need to learn them fast. So I did, or so I’d like to believe I did. Then a year later, I became a charge nurse. How I became errr, responsible for one whole unit when I can’t even make sound decisions for my own life, I don’t know. But I lasted 4 years faking that brave face whenever I step in the battlefield. Charge nursing made me more prayerful. I always had that prayer on my way to work, asking for guidance for safe practice and that nobody dies in my shift from malpractice, and that’s for the rest of the team.
Clinically, I was able to hone my senses. Eyes, ears,nose, touch, reasoning and whathaveyou. I learned how to make diagnosis and prognosis right that moment they walk in. My across the room assessment becomes so accurate, it’s clairvoyant. I learned how to trust my gut about patients bullshitting and those overly stoic even when they’re about to die; eventually saving limbs and lives.
From living alone, I learned how to be my own maid. And I realized I am one messy, annoying and bitch of a boss. Nuff said.
I learned how to appreciate my family more. I get to see them only once a year, so I fought with my sister less, I spoiIed my teenage brother, said I love you to my parents more often and I steered clear from brewing storms as much as I can. You realize what they’re worth, when they’re far and that you can not substitute their love for anything else in the world.
So I grew up. But I need to grow more. I still need to find my place under the sun.